It was only a matter of time though, wasn’t it? There’s only so far one can go as an artist after wearing a Jean Charles de Castlebajac frock made of Kermit the Frog dolls; and everyone knows the sell-by-date of a meat dress. As for the Royal Demure, there’s no fear of pushing boundaries as one simply doesn’t push after all. Or does one?
If whispers can be believed, the soon-to-be Mrs. Mountbatten-Windsor is receiving a crash course in being a royal which one would presume also extends to sartorial propriety. Bucking convention doesn’t seem to be the done thing at Buckingham Palace as the recent furore surrounding her decision to wear a black dress to a friend’s wedding would suggest. If that’s the case, aul Liz must be busting a gut at artist Rich Simmons’ depiction of the couple on London’s Southbank as Sid Vicious and Nancy Spungeon. Leopard print, biker jackets and dog collars – quite. Still, with rumours of Victoria Beckham dressing Kate for her honeymoon, one may well see the birth of a savvy fashion coalition. (Not exactly media shy our Posh.)
If Lady Gaga wants to regain any ground, she’ll be forced to reinvent herself as a mega royal hybrid; ideally one with the multiple lovers of Catherine the Great and a personal couture budget to rival that of Queen Raina. She could buy titles for the House of Gaga serfs on www.royaltitles.com and create her own fashion monarchy (just $197 with a 12-month guarantee!).
Once her court has been established, she’ll engage in a diplomatic outreach with her rival, even agreeing to take tea at Buckingham Palace; but in a shrewd volte face, she’ll arrive covered in jumpsuit made of toy corgis. There again, she could always just opt for a twin set and pearls; but where’s the fun in that?
