Plumes. For us fashion folk, that means feathers – ideally large decorative ones. Flamingo, pheasant, ostrich – we’re not fussy. Factor in one volcanic hiccup and it’s a whole other catwalk. Since Iceland began messing with our airspace and the ability to jet off at will, there’s a new sense of urgency afoot. Fashion Week frenzy? Puh-leez. I’ll see you and raise you a stranded designer in Dublin Airport.
You see it’s all about the patois. Ash won’t do and – too recession. Plumes evoke a sense of power and majesty – even if that does entail less than regal ferry travel. My most recent exchange involved Henry Holland’s PR. “Henry’s flight back home has been cancelled on account of the plume,” she explained. “Can you by any chance interview him earlier so he can catch the ferry?” How theatrical! Delighted to be part of the fashion histrionics, I made haste to our rendezvous where he and I chatted about kyboshed schedules and the elusive ‘arrival’ factor. Will Henry make it to London to film another episode of Frock Me with gal pal Alexa Chung? Thank God for twitter updates; and yes, he did.
The last time I heard a PR get so flustered was London Fashion Week when front row royalty Naomi Campbell (finally) arrived for Vivienne Westwood’s Red Label show. “It’s fine; it’s fine,” the charge panted. “She’s here. It can all begin.” There’s nothing like a delayed arrival in fashion to pique interest; hence the term ‘fashionably late’.
With reports of said plume not dispersing for another five months, the worst may be yet to come. Just imagine the fall-out: models being forced to inter-rail from Paris to Milan, couture couriered by jet ski, photoshoots directed by Skype; Anna Wintour travelling Stena Line. Then again, the kerfuffle may well foster a new style order; think Moet snipes on ferry crossings (with straw of course), an Orient Express revival and Breton stripes as standard. No measly 10kg luggage allowance, no 8”x8” plastic bag challenge for cosmetics and most of all, no taking off your shoes to walk through a metal detector. Result.
Sure, it might take twice as long to get anywhere. And yes, the term ‘sail and rail’ may take some getting used to but us lot are all about the arrival. Now, if we could only engineer a red carpet at Dun Laoghaire port...
