Hen weekends; the clothing possibilities are endless. But with choice comes chance as I discovered at a friend’s pre-nuptials last weekend. My plan was to pack a failsafe trolley dolly of interchangeable basics – a tactic I believed would help me circumvent any fashion flubs. I succeeded in part. My silk Acne top and below-the-knee pencil skirt were a fitting combination and those suede-soled pony skin kitten heels purred sensible for a night on the tiles.
But alas, my game plan suffered a fatal flaw. As the Girl Guides say ‘always be prepared’; and it seemed this reveller left without her party map. Rather than spending the next few weeks praying that incriminating photos make it onto Facebook (that hush money is in the post girls), I’ve decided instead to share some insider information on dressing for the occasion.
Firstly, assess the terrain. Heels and any surface apart from a carpeted interior can potentially lead to a head-over-boob situation. Although I tackled a cobbled street without as much as a scratched heel (Paris Fashion Week has me well trained!), the same can’t be said for that wet patch on the nightclub floor. Let’s just say the irony wasn’t lost on the fact that I was dancing to Footloose.
Next, keep it simple. You never know when you may have to alight a bucking bronco. The combination of a body con skirt and turquoise knickers meant the punters in an establishment-that-shall-remain-nameless got a sideshow with their beer chasers. “Only a few people watching,” I thought to myself, forgetting the whole episode was caught on a 42” widescreen TV in the inside bar. Gulp.
Finally and most importantly, choose your accessories wisely. Bunny ears, angel wings, feather boas and princess tiaras are the essence of any hen party. Not only do they allow you one last chance to play dress up before making that trip up the aisle, they’re damn good fun too! Choosing to attach a plastic ‘member’ to my Tiffany key pendant was fun at the time, but two hours and a few cocktails later however, I soon forgot about my little friend. Let’s just say it attracted its fair share of attention.
Still, the night was a resounding success and I’ve returned, not only with fond memories of friends, but with an enhanced appreciation for M&S boy shorts...and sole grips.
